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Doing What You Say You Will

Melony and I got really klapped by our young Guy the other and what was highlighted for me was twofold. First how careful we have to be in what we say we will do – especially to our children. Second. How easy it is to shoot yourself in foot with the best intentions in the world. There were two incidents only a couple of days apart.

THE FIRST.
We had told Guy that we were going down to a local nursery because we wanted a plant to fill a gap in a hedge and he said he would rather stay at home. On the way there Melony suddenly remembered that we need some washing powder so we made a small detour to the local supermarket and while we were there – literally five minutes – her cell went and it was our maid who said that Guy wanted to chat. He does that from time to time and we humour it as we know that it is a comfort thing for him that although we are physically there he can reach out to us and have contact. We know this is important. His first question and it is one he usually opens his conversations with, was “Where are you?” Quite innocently Melony replied “In the supermarket”. There was moment of silence and a very indignant voice “You said you were going to the nursery!” There is no way you can talk your way out of that! All the explanations in world are going to be hollow!

THE SECOND.
We were all together in the car and as we passed a small shopping centre Melony asked me to pull over so she could pop in and get some milk. As she got out she said “Don’t park I’ll just run in and get what I need”. She then proceeded to walk across the small car park to the shop. Guy stuck his head out of the window and shouted “You said you were going to run!” Ouch!

Little things and easy to dismiss as being unimportant and of course they are to us so-called adults. I am not so sure that they have the same lack of importance to a little one who is beginning to wrestle with the huge complexity of life. Where when they see something, hear something, smell something, touch something or taste something – it MUST the way that it is because it forms part of their experience and if they cannot trust their experience then the world becomes a very unreliable place indeed – especially when Mum and Dad are at the heart of that experience.